Can we ever really recover?

It's not unusual for a mix in communication or a bad first impression to result in some kind of hatred towards one person.

We should never judge a book by its cover. What a cliche! But I guess it's right; many of us have an idealistic image in our heads of how we want ourselves to look therefore we use our image to portray ourselves. Or it may work the other way with what we can only describe as a mix in communication between us and ourselves where we don't even realise how powerful our image is and we find ourselves making bad first impressions without opening our mouths!

There are many examples of each in today's society; we judge what we call 'emo's' for their use of black eyeliner and their black attire which adorns their white skin for the contrast! (So I think!) And by dressing and acting in these ways, they socially attach themselves to every other 'emo', leaving the rest of us with endless opportunities to play with stereotypes and judge one person based on another whom may have looked similar.

It's like anybody who wears a hoody or some tracksuit bottoms is automatically branded a chav; automatically branded an acronym which stands for 'Council Housed And Violent'. What a compliment to those of us who just wanted a day of comfort!

People too often perform mass internal judgements on slight first impressions.

But it's always the case, if you come across nice a few people will find out and you might get a few more smiles each day; make a bad impression and everybody within a sixty-five mile radius finds out!

Dress how you want to be seen and don't allow your nerves to put you in a state of ignorance!
- Or whatever, look up, above and beyond, and do what makes you happy.

Kacee xx

One day we'll all expire...then go on forever?

I often wonder if it's us making the decisions in life.

We could be in a computer game.
We could be a tiny part of something, like a small ant's nest.

It's all too much to get your head around; too many possibilites and too much uncertainty.

We live in a world where there's always somebody higher who can help; there's always somebody who can control the situation. But, when it comes to life, afterlives and natural occurances, nobody is in control and we find this hard to accept because it's not something we're familiar with.

We rant on about the 'chapters' in our lives but what if 'life' is just a chapter of something bigger, something we aren't aware of. We've already established my mind works in weird ways, so just roll with what I'm saying! It kind of makes sense. I can't get my head around the fact that we die and then supposedly go to some place else. Well, according to some people, but to others, we come back as another animal or creature depending on how we behaved in our previous life. And so if this is the case should we live for the moment, or for our next life?

Everything we do is to a time limit, even though we may not realise it. When people say 'nothing lasts forever', that's the reality. Everything comes to an end, has a start and finish and eventually expires so to speak. I find it so difficult to think about what happens when we die. My mind can't physically think about or imagine the term 'forever'. And we use the term 'forever' too loosely because as I say nothing can be forever unless it's 'our' forever, until there is no forever left. See I'm not even making much sense now because my head slightly explodes inside itself when I try to imagine us laying underground forever...there's no end, that we know of. It makes me slightly panicky and warm.

But if we all came with an expiry date, like the milk in my fridge and the bread in my cupboard, we could make sure we do everything we need to before it's too late.

Head? Heart? Forget it?

We all deserve to be happy right? But saying that, to what extent should we go to make ourselves happy? To what extent is it right to hurt someone else in order to gain ourselves happiness?

I can’t figure it.

There’s no guide to life. And, aside from the law, there’s no right or wrong. So, how are we supposed to make decisions?

I’m only 19 and so far I’ve learnt that sometimes we have to have jumped in the deep end and nearly drowned for us to learn a lesson. But often, even that isn’t enough.

I still can’t seem to gage when it’s worth taking the leap.

In awkward situations there always seems two ways out; one which hurts us and one which hurts somebody else, but which should we take? Should we perform acts of selfishness so we can have a smile on our own face? In life we have ourselves. Not each other; we can rely on nobody as much as we can rely on ourselves. No-one will tell us what to do, although if we’re lucky, they may advise us.

Trust no-one and don’t depend on anybody so much that you’re leaning on them because if they step to the side you’ll be on the ground. At rock bottom.

The question is, do we follow our heads or our hearts?

(almost) speechless!

It’s a quick one, because I’ve just got back from London and I’m totally worn out!

If I’m honest, I’m not sure where to start or what to say. I’m totally appalled at what I’m watching on the news, and appalled at myself for watching what I’m watching. It’s absolutely disgusting that children in hoodies are running round cities committing arson and throwing things are police and any general public who are getting in their way. From the footage I’ve seen, the police are just acting as invigilators watching over them, like in an exam hall except in this case the kids running about are too young to even sit an exam! It’s disgusting. Where are their parents? And more to the point, what do they think they are getting out of their actions? Is it the thrill, the adrenaline or just the fact that they’re causing problems?

I take that back about the Police, I know and the whole country knows how much they are doing for US. We need to piece it back together so we, as a whole, can move on from this heartless act of so many people.

The media sector are doing nothing more than scaremongering and encouraging further riots. They’re handing it to the little shits on a plate. And they don’t even realise. The internet is going mad with constant updates on where the riots are, who’s been injured and what shop has become the next ‘free-for-all’ and the more we sit at home taking it all in, the more we panic. Rumours are spreading faster than the fires by the arsonists and the rioters are buzzing off the reception which the news channels and public are giving them. The news channels could have done nothing better than mention the streets were a little unsettled, warn people to be safe and then move on.

I’ve been in London the past few nights while the riots have been slowly spreading from Tottenham and it hasn’t even felt like a big deal. It’s only now we’re home that we have realised the extent of what has been going on. In a few of the pubs there were big screens to keep people updated but it never seemed like an issue. This morning we considered jumping on the tube to check Camden out, where there were riots last night. Funnily enough we had planned to go out in Camden last night and at last minute changed our mind, purely for the fact that with the money we would pay for the tube, we could buy an extra glass of wine in Leicester Square instead! It’s a good job we had our wine heads on or we may still be stranded in Camden now!

Now the riots have moved up North. I clicked on #manchesterriots which is currently trending on Twitter and it’s mad to see how mental people are going. One of the best things I read was about the looting, somebody mentioned how crazy it is that people are stealing shoes because they clearly haven’t realised they’re only going to get either a right or left foot! And I’m not even going to mention the image which has been uploaded of the idiot planking in the middle of the riot.

I’m getting tired now so I’m just going to finish by saying when I was 11 I could just about spell my own name, I’d never have dreamt of going out with petrol bombs or bricks. And I didn’t even know the definition of looting.

Where’s the justice? And, where’s our water cannons, guns, or any sign of violently fighting back? Wow.

We’re hosting the Olympics next year, just saying!

….more on my FIRST trip to London soon! xx